Full Transcript
Right after the break, we’re gonna interview Eric Wyhein Mayer, who climbed the highest mountain in the world, Mount Everest. But he’s gay. I mean, he’s gay, excuse me, he’s blind.
David:
And this is Gatriarchs. It’s 2024. Hi.
Gavin:
20 a new year, new me, new everything. Oh my god. I mean, 2023 wasn’t bad, was it? I mean, hey, man, we created a podcast in 2023.
David:
We created a podcast that we monetized. And if you don’t, I know I think I might have posted this on my personal stories, but I should post it on the Gaterix. Uh, we made our first income in 2023, and it was drumroll 49 cents. 49 cents this podcast has gotten us.
Gavin:
So we’re realizing the dream, which was let’s start a podcast to become millionaires within two years. That was the whole invention, right?
David:
And it happened.
Gavin:
It will have happened. This time next year, it’ll be uh 49 million.
David:
Oh, all right. That sounds good. Um anyway, it’s 2024, it’s a new year, it’s a new year. Us, it’s the first new episode. We know you guys have been listening to some of our throwbacks to our favorite guests, but we are eager to be back in the chat.
Gavin:
It was fun to go back and listen to those, huh?
David:
From our forgotten a lot about us, a lot of our conversations today. We were babies, our mics were different, our lighting was different. We didn’t know what the fuck we were doing. We still don’t really know what the fuck we’re doing.
Gavin:
Nope.
David:
Um, before we dive in, I wanted to just kind of do a holiday roundup because I feel like the holidays happen and we weren’t on the air at the time, and all the things happen. And I just feel like there’s always interesting stories to talk about, um, especially when it comes to kids. My son had a Christmas concert at his daycare, and it’s very cute. It’s all these preschool kids barely trying, not really singing, the teacher in the front trying to do the moves. It’s that thing.
Gavin:
Funny enough, I was at almost exactly the same Christmas concert, but with middle schoolers, and believe me, the level of chaos was pretty much identical to a preschool.
David:
And also, like the teacher who’s like leading it, you can tell secretly has always wanted to be on Broadway. Do you know what I mean? There’s a little bit of vibe there. Anyway, so they do that, they have these like three levels of risers, and they’re doing this. They’re I want a hippopotamus for Christmas. Oh my son is in the top row, and he’s like, you know, dancing around and he’s doing really good. He’s clearly the child of gay parents. That’s all I’m gonna say. He is performing at a Broadway level, and then they’re supposed to walk around their chairs to like do something. There’s no backing to this riser. It’s like those chorus risers, and it just plummets. He just disappears. Disappears. And everyone kind of gasps. I jump up, I run back there. He’s on the ground, he’s crying. Cut to the cut to the chase, he’s fine, everyone. This is does not end in like a hospital stay. But it was just like the drama of of all of this. And then so I take them and I’m like, Do you want to keep going? And he’s crying, he’s like, Yes. So then I like sit with him on stage. So now I’m in the spotlight.
SPEAKER_03:
So now I’m ready to perform motherfuckers. She is.
David:
Yes, she is. It’s it’s David Fm Bond, the 44-year-old, surrounded by three and four-year-olds. And um, anyway, everyone was very sweet. Everyone came came up to us, like, is he okay? Is he okay? And he was just very he was clearly embarrassed more than he was physically hurt. But I have on video my child dancing, and then just he’s not there anymore. Just fucking David blanded out of the way.
Gavin:
My partner lives for the Macy’s parade in the hope that somebody’s gonna trip, especially in marching bands, or also some video that was viral 105 years ago about like a uh a holiday concert where some actually older person was there and then suddenly wasn’t, and it was on the Today Show. And man, he just laughs and laughs and laughs about it, which is terrible, but that’s why we have a podcast to talk about what terrible people we are.
David:
I remember there was a Macy’s parade that um one of the raquettes just turned the wrong direction, and you can just see in her face be like, This is my legacy. This right here. This pivot step the wrong direction, my legacy.
Gavin:
But you’re forever. I mean, that’s that’s a claim to fame. I don’t think that’s such a bad thing.
David:
It’s like that one dancer in chorus line, the original movie, at the very, very, very, very end when the camera’s backing out and they’re all doing the just the step kicks, stops one count early. Do you know this? Have you watched this? Watch it at the very, very, very end. You it’s barely in frame, but he stops one count before everyone else. And you know his butt. And I’m like, why did you not just reshoot it?
Gavin:
Right. Uh that that’s the kind of thing that should we should drop into our non-existent show notes, I think. I would love a little bit more. Yeah, 2024, still no show notes. Maybe 2025. Let’s aim for let’s aim high. Um, we had an interesting holiday season as uh my kids are of an age where they want to believe in all the magic, and they are at the same time their own level of, you know, they’re wanting to believe. They’re they are in the magic of believing phase and they are forcing the magic still, which is kind of sweet. You know, they want to go along with it all. But our elf on the shelf, when that when ginger, our our um gender non-conforming elf on the shelf wouldn’t move, they kind of were just like, okay, that’s fine.
David:
Uh how do you put ginger the elf on the shelf’s pronouns, right? But not most of our guests. I want to know why. I want to know why gave it.
Gavin:
Well, listen, I I fuck them up all the time because our elf on the shelf uses they, them pronouns, and I say she all the time.
David:
But my kids lead me with saying that ginger is she, even though clearly we have a non-binary uh, but is it like is it like you’re saying she, not in a gendered way, but in a like old-timey pirate talking about his boat kind of way?
Gavin:
No, we have had it’s funny. This let’s bring this up next December, December of 2024. The reason we have a non-binary um elf, but I wanted to have a unique elf. Um, so I wrote Santa to have the right kind of unique elf sent. I mean, there’s children listening to this podcast. No, they’re not. Okay, never mind. I went to Barnes and Noble. So we’re in a lot of trouble. I went to Barnes and Noble years ago. The only elves they had were a bunch of little white boys with blue eye elves, right? And I thought, oh, this is really basic. And I thought, you know what, I want to spice it up a little bit. So I got a little skirt for our blue-eyed boy. And I um the elf appears, and uh my kids, one of my daughter says, What is her name? What’s her name? What’s her name? Or no, no, I think it was what’s whatever. She gendered the elf right away, even though it was a short-haired boy with a skirt. And I said, Well, maybe it’s not a I don’t know, maybe it’s a boy, maybe it’s a girl. I mean, short hair, skirt, like, I don’t know, those things can go to together. And my son, who was at the time in kindergarten, so he was four or five, he goes, Maybe it’s a transginger elf.
David:
So transgender. Wow.
Gavin:
Or transgender elf. So our elf’s name was then transginger jingle. Those are the most delicious fats, are the transgender ones. That is adorable. I know, isn’t it? I mean, it was very progressive, wasn’t it? And so that is why we have a um uh a trans elf, and I fuck up ginger’s pronouns all the time. Although, you know what? They never tell me, they never correct me. I mean, it is my job to listen, but literally, my elf has yet to find their voice and let me know exactly what their pronouns are, but I try to aim for they, them, which usually means I say, Well, she, they are up on up in the bathroom today. Did you notice that she, they are on the bookcase now?
David:
This is the indoctrination at work, everyone. This is how the gays make more gays. This is the agenda.
Gavin:
Listen, we started this podcast because we want to be able to let people know they’re not alone and that parenting is a real struggle and that sometimes we think we you and I have such huge egos that we gave ourselves a platform to basically dole out advice and cynicism, right? I think another level of advice was I want to discuss with you what would you do. Let’s have some scenarios, and I want to hear what you would do in a certain scenario, okay?
David:
I imagine every day that what would you do segment on 2020 happening to me. So when something weird happens to me in public, I immediately think there’s cameras on me. That’s the only way I do the right thing.
Gavin:
Yeah. Okay. Also, also, this reminds me, my partner, for some reason, and I don’t know if it has to do with a song from a musical or what. I mean, most likely it’s a song from a musical. Do you know some song that goes, What would you do? Something like that.
David:
Well, whenever eight Broadway shows everyone.
Gavin:
So he um he uh whenever he hears the term what would you do, he sings it like that. So we might have to have have him make an appearance on the podcast and record something for us. Leading into the what would you do segment. Anyway, David, scenario number one. What would you do? Uh your kid says in the morning, I don’t feel good. I want to stay home from school. But you know they are perfectly fine, no fever, no sickness, no nothing. What would you do? They go to school. That’s easy. Plain and simple.
David:
Yeah. Honestly, you didn’t even need to add that they’re not really sick part. Right. If I have shit to do, they’re going to school. Okay. I’m filling them with Tylenol, I’m pushing them into the school.
Gavin:
We’ve definitely talked about this before. Uh in my and so I wanted to lead off with an easy one. But I have to say, um, eventually, if I think, okay, I can deal with you being at home today, but you realize that this is not a day that you’re gonna sit home and watch TV the entire time, right? I make sick days as miserable as possible. The TV doesn’t go on until frankly after school. Okay, I always break down and by noon the TV is on probably for a while. But I’m like, okay, then if you’re sick, then I understand you need to stay home and you’re gonna lay in bed and read books the entire time.
David:
I think it’s because my point of view is from a dad of a four-year-old and a not even two-year-old. But maybe with older kids I’d feel differently. But no, you’re going to fucking school.
Gavin:
It’s gonna be and it’s gonna be miserable uh if you stay home and then you’re not gonna want to stay home again. Okay. Scenario two. What did you do? Your partner listens to you complain about what a monster your kid was all day long. And their response is, I mean, maybe you should just like make things more fun. How do you respond?
David:
Um, well, uh, some they’re about to catch my hands because I’m going to jail. No. Um I it’s so funny. I would my my husband could never say that because my immediate thought was$3.99 divorce. Immediate. I’m like, fuck off. Are you kidding me? Fuck you. I think if you’ve done parenting long enough with your partner, you both know how fucking hard it is to do all the things. And even though you might have that instinct of like, well, why don’t you just you know in the back of your mind you’re like, no, no, no, no. It’s never gonna go well. That’s never gonna go well. It’s not a good suggestion, and also it’s just gonna piss everyone off. So um, if they said that I would divorce them immediately and start dating Chris Pratt.
Gavin:
Well, I mean, but what if Chris Pratt says it to you?
David:
That’s perfectly fine. He can say whatever’s rich and beautiful, yeah. Yeah, you can say it to me.
Gavin:
Okay. Um, that this actual situation happened to me many times back in the day, and uh yeah, it never went well, but I would have to leave the room or um or yeah, I mean, I think plain and simple, it’s just leave the room and just think about what you’ve just said because man, at home all day long parenting, it’s the hardest job on the planet. So uh don’t tell me to make things just more fun. Okay, finally, another parent texts you that your kid kicked their kid at the playground, but you have it on good authority that their kid is the aggressor and in all situations usually the asshole. Plus, the parent is a total asshole. What would you do?
David:
So there’s two rounds of the answer. The first round is the first thing I would do, which is I would make some sort of light joke like, man, so sorry about that. Kids are assholes, right? Ha ha ha. And test the temperature of the other parent. Do they go, yeah, my kid’s not perfect either? So I know that like they get it. And then, or if they’re like, well, just you know, whatever. And then the second, if it, if if their kid does something a second time and they were the asshole, I would bring it up to them immediately. But the first time I would lean in with a joke and test the waters and be like, are you like cool or are you just being a psychopath? Because if you’re a psychopath, then I’m gonna make your life a living hell. And every time your kid sneezes wrong, I’m gonna tell the front desk.
Gavin:
Oh, nice. But you go to the authorities and you go.
David:
Oh no, I do the cowardly way.
Gavin:
I let them do it.
unknown:
Yeah.
Gavin:
All right. Well, I hope that that was helpful for everybody because I don’t want to have that scenario to come to me whatsoever, and I don’t want to deal with it because I just want to hide from um confrontation. But um, thank you. Absolutely. And now I know what would you do.
David:
That’s really that’s that’s those are some golden pipes of yours, Gavin. But we also have a recording of your golden pipes for our top three list.
Gavin:
Gatriarch’s top three list, three, two, one.
David:
Uh, it gets better and better every time. Um, so uh we initially in what November when we last had our live episode, um, had a top three list for January. And what did we do? We scrapped it. Come at a meeting and we were like, fuck that. We’re gonna do something different. Yeah so tell us what our top three list is this week, Gavin.
Gavin:
Today’s top three list is three parenting resolutions you’re sure you’re gonna break. Okay. And uh let me start, shall I? Parenting resolution number three that I am certain to break is not bending to the more TikTok time in the afternoon until all of the chores are done. This is so basic. I’m not sure if it’s even funny, but it every single day I think to myself, I’m not gonna give extra TikTok time until I know that everything is done. And then I frankly end up doing it anyway. So this is something that you’ll be able to welcome when you have older kids, okay? Number two, resolution that I’m certain to break is playing soccer and having quality time with my kids every single day. Because, and I know that frankly, in their they they want to be able to have that quality time, but that quality time is on my back. And man, like sometimes I just don’t want to do it or I forget to do it because work takes over, which is terrible and makes me look like a complete monster. And I know I’m gonna break that rule, but I did say I was gonna do it. And then, number one parenting resolution that I’m certain to break is having fish once a week. Oh, I love fish, but the battle of making my kids eat fish is just not worth it. And when I think about it, I didn’t really like fish until I was actually in college and had a more refined palate. So why am I trying to force this upon my kids? So, right now it’s fish at once a week in some form, and we’ll see if it lasts through the third week of January. What about you? What are your top three parenting resolutions you’re sure to break?
David:
All right, number three for me is uh a little bit of a crossover, and it’s being creative in my meals. I just feel myself giving up. It’s like, and and we’re not quite a chicken nuggets um uh mac and cheese family yet, but we’re close. We’re real, real close. We get those at least once a week. Um, and I used to like force them. I’m like, you know, we’re adding sushi tonight, and you’re gonna fucking eat it or you’re gonna starve. And now I’m just like, yeah, or we’ll just get McDonald’s. So number three, being creative in my meals. Number two, fucking cursing around my kids. I got away with it for so long because they were so young, and now my son is four. And as we know out of my TikTok video, he’s starting to repeat shit. Yes, he does. So I have a filthy mouth as the explicit uh warning on this podcast um shows. And I just I I think I’ve decided that kids need to know that there’s some words that adults can say and that they can’t. Uh, but hey, it’s about teaching limits.
Gavin:
It’s a privilege that you get by listening to your dads and getting straight A’s in your school, and then eventually you can cuss at home. Yep.
David:
But uh, and number one resolution that I’m trying, but I will guarantee uh to fail at is being less angry. I am the unangriest person you’ve ever met. If you’ve ever been a friend, but and yet after having children, I go from zero to I’m blowing up this house and leaving the family in a split second. And it’s never over anything huge. It’s never thing like I wrecked a car and killed somebody. It’s me saying, put on your fucking shoes for the 25th time every single day.
Gavin:
That makes me go to a hundred. You’ve got 10 more years to try to balance that anger. So I’m glad that this is the year that you’re gonna curtail it.
David:
I tell you what, Gavin, we need to get an audio uh like jingle of you saying, just you wait, because you just you wait me all the fucking time. Um, so our top three list for next week is one I’m very excited about. Top three ways you’re making your kid weird.
SPEAKER_03:
Oh, I love that.
David:
That’s great. One popped up immediately for me. I was like, oh yeah, I’m totally making him weird. So, yeah, top three ways you’re making your kid weird.
Gavin:
There’s no amount of hyperbole or sarcasm that does justice to the badassery that is our guest today. He is world famous for being a seven summits mountain climber for all of you Nancy’s out there. That means he has climbed every one of the highest peaks on every continent. And he’s a Grand Canyon kayaker, a motivational speaker, a best-selling author, and of course, doing all of this with the biggest challenge of all while being a father. Oh, and he’s blind. Here to make us feel really underaccomplished. Please welcome our newest honorary Gatriarch, Eric Weinmeyer.
David:
Eric, welcome. So I have to I have to be honest with you, Eric. I want to let you know why you’re here. You’re probably like, why am I on a gay dads podcast? I’m not gay. I am. I did have a few friends ask me that. So they don’t just interview gay people. It’s like guys. So so first of all, you’re you’re totally right. We initially were like, oh, yeah, we’ll just make it about gay dads, but then we’re like, no, fuck this. This is our show. We get to choose who come on, who comes on the show. But here’s here’s how your name came up. So we were brainstorming guests for 2024. This is our first episode of the new year. And uh, I was thinking, oh, remember that guy who was on that news blooper and he was the mountain climber who was blind and they accidentally said gay. And it was funny. And Gavin was like, yeah, why? And I was like, well, I you know he’s actually gay, right? And Eric, and and Gavin said, No, I didn’t know that. That’s so great. So we started kind of doing the process and emailing you and everything. And then I was like, let me just Google that to make sure. And I was like, oh, look at his beautiful wife and family. He’s not gay. And you know what it was? It was one of those things, because this happened. This news blooper we’re talking about happened, what, 17 years ago? This was during the time of the internet when we would just email each other videos. There was no like sharing on Instagram or verifying information. I wasn’t gonna Google anything. I had heard from somebody, oh, isn’t it ironic he’s actually gay? And then Eric, I believed it without checking the sources, and I spread that rumor to everyone I knew. So I was like, oh, this would be a really cool guest. And then we were like, wait a minute, I have been spreading this misinformation for almost two decades.
SPEAKER_01:
So, but we were like people were like, whoa, how did you feel about that? I was like, it was the greatest uh media ever. Like, hardly anyone learned about my Everest climb, but everyone knows about my gay clip. I’m like, you made me famous. Thank you so much. I play it in my presentations. Oh, yeah. You know, uh when I’m speaking to companies, it’s the biggest laugh I get. And it’s not the fact that you know being gay is funny or being blind is funny, it’s just How do the two get get mixed up? Yeah. Well, I will tell you that being gay is very funny, but you can complain. And shouldn’t be. But but then the the funniest part was that um um afterwards it became like this I don’t know, this whole momentum where like people were writing rap songs. Literally, you can go online and you can see the rap song made of that show. And it’s like he’s gonna gay. And it’s like and they slow it down, and there’s like a whole rap song. And you’re like, somebody spent time on this. Somebody spent time on this, and then there’s a string of hundreds of comments. You know how everyone makes a comment like, well, is he gay? Oh, you know, all blind people are gay, and hey, my grandmother’s blind, shut up. Hey, my grandmother’s gay, shut up. And it’s like this thousand idiotic comments down below, and you just every one of them is hilarious.
David:
No, can I actually going off that, but before our interview, I was kind of going through those videos. First of all, I have that video memorized. When I tell you that that was part of my like growing up, I have I have the tone of the way she said it, which direction her head was looking. I went to the YouTube comments because I just wanted to look at them, and there are some real funny ones, and I want to read them to you right now, and you probably so here’s some of my favorites. One is his parents have disowned him and he’s bullied at school, but this young man can’t keep his secret from the world anymore. He’s blind. Another one is uh imagine trying to climb a mountain and be gay. You can’t even walk straight. And my favorite is as a blind man, I can’t tell you how confusing it gets to accidentally wake up next to another man every morning. Um I mean, it’s just so stupid. But you’re right, it propelled you into the news media in a way that you couldn’t have purchased. You couldn’t have purchased that. That’s true.
SPEAKER_01:
No, it was brilliant. It was it was hilarious. And then I still have friends. I mean, this was like 10 years ago. I still have friends that it because it goes around on Instagram and you know, like they’ll write me and be like, have you seen this? And I’m like, Yes, I’ve seen it.
David:
Have you seen it? It changed my life, you fucking asshole. So you get to be a guest by accident, but when we started kind of kind of getting to know you virtually before we actually got to know you, we were like, oh, this guy’s fucking amazing. He’s gonna be on the show. Fuck everyone. He’s a dad.
Gavin:
And he’s also um he’s also exactly what we I mean, we started this podcast. We often say this, because we want people to know that parenting is really tough. Uh, what else is there that’s tougher? And that you aren’t alone when sometimes you, you know, want to be able to talk shit about your kids. And and also at the same time, we want to help parenting be just a little bit easier and help inspire people to raise great kids. And uh so um, that’s you know, that’s all you fit into that category.
SPEAKER_01:
But before we move into parenting, just know that because of my video, I hope you consider me an honorary gay man. Oh, dude. There’s a fist bump.
David:
Yes, fist bump. You are an honorary gay man. To get your official card, you’re gonna have to do a lot more, Eric. And we’ll we’ll talk about that maybe offline.
Gavin:
What is more exhausting? Climbing Mount Everest, or frankly, having a newborn.
SPEAKER_01:
I mean, climbing mountains is really hard, but to be honest with you, I mean, parenting is exhausting. I still remember, you know, um being with my daughter um all day and just trying to figure out how to keep her entertained when she was a toddler, let’s say. And you know, we’re playing polypockets, and and she’s like, Dad, you just ripped the pants off the polypocket. You’re doing it wrong. I’m like, oh, sorry. And then like, okay, what’s next? You know, there’s you can’t take a nap, you know, you gotta watch her the whole time. And no, so I I would actually give parenting a baby or a toddler um uh slightly more difficult than climbing mountains, honestly.
David:
Oh man.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, it it’s mentally exhausting. Yeah, you gotta have a plan, you know, for the day.
David:
Yeah. So now so you’re saying, since it’s more exhausting, that I have officially done something more uh difficult than climbing Mount Everest? Is that what you’re saying? Can I write this down? All right, you can put that in your bio. I’m gonna stitch this on a pillow, actually.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, and and then we go outside and play on the little dollhouse and and swing. And you know, it’s like it’s sort of like my dog. My I have a beautiful guide dog, and I’ll pet her for like 10 minutes, and it’s like, okay, now go away. You know, but she’s like, no, that’s not enough.
Gavin:
More. I want more. But petting a dog is something that you can do while I at least being able to um do something else at the same time. But kids are so all-encompassing that takes incredible focus, especially at that toddler age where you it’s just all about playing imaginary play that is mind-numbing.
David:
And time doesn’t do the same thing when you because I have a four-year-old and a one and a half-year-old. And time is not the same at this age because what will happen is you’ll go, you’ll pet the dog for 10 minutes, you’ll play polypockets for an hour, you’ll go outside on the deck, you’ll walk around, you do this, you watch TV, blah, blah, blah, and then you’ll look at the clock and it’s 8 47 a.m. And you just want to walk into traffic. You’re just like, I I I’ve lived an entire fucking lifetime. Why is it 8 47 a.m.?
SPEAKER_01:
And the repetition is, you know, like I was playing with my friend’s kids the other day. I have this nice swing in my basement, and I’d hold it like all the way up, and I’d be like, oh, the swing’s broken. And then I’d be like, whoops, uh, and they’d swing them and they’d crack up. And it’s like, again, again, again. And you know, it’s funny, like, but the hundredth time, they’re like, again, again, that’s the greatest, you know, and you’re like, oh man, I’m hungry.
Gavin:
Hungry for just quiet for a little while. Um, so tell us though, what what were some of your tips and tricks for parenting as a um in in your situation? What how did you deal with polypockets and how did you know how to match the polypocket clothes? And what were some of your um uh techniques there?
SPEAKER_01:
Well, I can’t ever say that I became an expert, but you know, at at first when we were thinking about having kids, and then we’ll get to this, I know, but I adopted uh a boy from Nepal when he was five. But uh, you know, I always worried, you know, like, gosh, can I be a good parent as a blind person? I can’t play catch, you know. Um, I won’t be able to like toss the football as well as a sighted dad. And so all those worries go through your mind. But I think I’ve we found really fun things, you know, like I take my kids to the climbing gym and uh and with my boy we’d wrestle down in the basement and you know, make up all these wonderful imaginary games. I have a big medicine ball, like one of those big giant blow-up balls. So if it hits you in the face, it doesn’t hurt that much. And we’d toss that around. We had gymnastic mats that were the cloak of invisibility, and you know, it was just all about imagination, and that was really fun. And I had a big I have a big wrestling mat so we can all run around and not you know not fall or trip or get hurt, you know, it’s all soft landing. So I built that environment for my kids. Um when they were little, um, I had a friend go out and help me um adapt board games to for the blind. Nowadays you can buy things that are um you know board games for the blind. Uh but back then, like Candyland, there’s all these different colors. And so what my friend does did was uh was put different textures on each of the colors. So like maybe red would be a rough texture and blue would be a smooth texture, and uh, you know, and green would be a a a round texture, you know what I mean? So I could decipher what the board game and I could play cards and and uh and different things with my kids. And then and the last thing I th did was with when Emma was l really little, um I bought these like squeaky shoes that like squeak every time she walks so that I’d be able to hear her running around the house. And then we had a rule where I say, Emma, you know, okay, no if I say Emma, where are you? you have to respond to daddy because um you you know you can’t play a little game where you’re hide, you know, playing hide and go seek with me. Right.
David:
So and so they they always knew you as a blind dad, right? There was not anything new to them, yeah, or different.
SPEAKER_01:
Not at all. Yeah. Not at all. In fact, I was so proud of my daughter, Emma, because when she was in high school, there’s a blind kid in her school, and uh he came into class a little bit late and he was like kind of trying to figure out a seat, and he was you know, everyone’s sitting in the seat, so there’s only like one seat left, and he’s kind of wandering around, and people are just staring at him. My daughter jumps up and just like walks over, says, Take my elbow, and brings him over to a seat. And so my kids they’ve met all kinds of people, every shape and size. You know, they they’ve reached out and shook hands with uh a person with who’s an amputee and basically has a clamp for a hand, and they’re like shaking the clamp. Hey man, some people have hands, some people have clamps. No big deal. And and and I guess I’m really proud of that, that that my kids now are so adaptable and take charge kind of kids and and and also have maybe a little bit more empathy than maybe otherwise.
David:
And they’re gonna lead by example, right? Those other kids in the classroom are gonna see that. And there’s a fear, right? There’s a fear of uh maybe a kid who doesn’t understand that to look at an amputee and go, oh, I don’t know if I can I touch, can I, you know, the and then they’ll watch your daughter kind of interact with these people uh at such a calm, normal way, and it will inspire them to act the same way. Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_01:
And my kids have learned there’s like no rules, like you know what I mean. You just kind of do what is friendly and what’s comfortable and and uh and don’t hold back, you know, don’t hesitate, don’t don’t allow that separation to you know to to to not be able to connect with people in special ways.
Gavin:
That it that seems like a really important takeaway of sincerity, frankly, in that in a world where there are so many um there’s so much diversity in terms of abilities and disabilities that don’t disconnect from people, don’t be afraid to address them, talk to people with disabilities, ask them about it. I just connect as humans. Is that what you would say?
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, 100%. Because I mean when I went blind, it was a week before my freshman year in high school, and my greatest fear wasn’t going blind. I mean, I could handle not being able to see, although, man, it’s like the visual world is beautiful, so I do miss it. But um but the real fear, like the grit gritty fear, the deep fear was not being able to connect with people, not being part of the food fights, not running around and having a great time in life and being in the thick of it all, you know, being on the sidelines, being shoved to this dark place and being left there and forgotten by the world. You know, uh going blind was scary, but you know, not living fully was freaking terrifying. Yeah. And so so I think, yeah, my kids know that and and uh and and understand that that connection is the most important thing.
Gavin:
That’s so important for everybody. So in your adventures, what you do is incredibly focused, and you have to take it seriously because life is really on the line all the time. But surely you laugh your ass off a lot. And I would love to know when you’re adventuring, what has been some of those times that you have um laughed the hardest.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, I mean, you’re 100% right. Uh, there’s places on the mountain where it’s like a no-mistake zone. It you don’t have to be an amazing athlete, but you have to have incredible focus, no mistakes, you know, one mistake and you’re dead. And you have to, you know, wrap your head around that. But at the same time, climbers have massively dark humor.
David:
You know, because that’s the life is on the line. You’re passing bodies on your way up, you know. Like you’ve got to have a little bit of a darkness in your humor to get by.
Gavin:
Plus, as a blind man, you’re gonna have a dark humor also because you just have to be able to laugh at life and laugh at the things around you. And then as an honorary gay man, there’s definitely dark humor there. So you’ve got three layers of it.
David:
Well, it’s proof, and if you watch there, there’s also another clip of that interview that you got famous for, where it’s on you, kind of on the other end, waiting for it when they weren’t actually recording, and you are just bursting out laughing. And you’re like, this is so fucking.
SPEAKER_01:
I couldn’t even hardly finish the interview. I was laughing so hard.
David:
But that’s what’s so brilliant about it is that like you you just like lean into the the the darkness of that moment where some people would be very taken aback, and you’re like, that is fucking hilarious because you knew what it would look like from her like from that point of view. For you, you’re like, whatever, who cares? I’m I’m not gay, but this is hilarious. But to her, you’re like, oh my god, she is never she’s still, by the way, I looked her up, she still works in Dallas as an anchor. She’s still there.
SPEAKER_01:
No, she got a promotion because of that. That video.
Gavin:
Good for her. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:
Well, so I’m happy. And then she had me on, by the way, and explained it all um when she went to Dallas. And and it was the fact that she um she said I had a gay activist on beforehand, and the script just got mixed up. So there’s an explanation for it.
Gavin:
Oh, so it was actually written in the script.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, yeah, I think so. So she just she was the victim.
Gavin:
She was the victim, right?
SPEAKER_01:
Uh but it was a fun, it was great. But but you asked about humor. So, like, yeah, I mean, there’s a lot of blind humor going on with my friends. You gotta be tough to survive hanging out with a bunch of you know, dirtbag climbing dudes. Um there’s organizations like the National Federation of the Blind, a very well-respected blindness organization, and they talk about humor and they say there shouldn’t really be humor at a blind person’s expense. And that’s tr maybe true, you know, like but there’s a subtle difference between laughing and connecting at the hilarious things that happened to you and just making total fun of yourself, you know, or or demeaning yourself. And so for me, yeah, we we we border on on that, but um you know, like when I summited Denali, the tallest peak in North America, we had timed it perfectly, and my family were now circling above us in a in a in a plane, watching us take our last steps. Wow. And it was really cool. And we’re all waving our ski pole at the plane and cheering. And my friend uh Jeff, I said, Hey, do you think they’ll know I’m here that I made it? Because we all have red suits on, we look identical to each other. He said, Oh yeah, they’re gonna know you’re here. You’re the only one waving your ski pool in the wrong direction. So, yeah, you’re you’re constantly having your balls busted in a beautiful way that you know just says, Hey, like blindness isn’t something that I’m scared of. It’s it’s just a part of me, and let’s connect with it. It’s not the most important part of me, but it is a significant part of who I am. Um, like I my friend Chris Morris, we were coming down Aconcagua, and you know, I walk and also that’s in South America.
Gavin:
I think that there are jokes that could be made about I mean the word cock is in the middle of that as well, by the way.
SPEAKER_01:
But anyway, now now you get it.
Gavin:
Now you know why you’re on the city.
SPEAKER_01:
You eat these big sausages in uh on Aconcagua that we bought in the supermarket. They’re giant sausages that we bring, and the the the Spanish name for them, the local name is D I K. Oh, nice.
David:
You just put it some you just so you just put some dick in your mouth, basically. Yeah, great. So there are a lot of uh dick jokes on that mountain. I tell you what, I the best people, my best friends of my life are the ones I can be the darkest with. So, like your friend there. Like that that’s that’s a sign of love and trust for sure.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, so I’m coming down the mountain and somebody’s like runs up and they give us some tea and they’re like, Is you are is your friend okay? Because I’m using these trekking poles and I’m probably like stumbling a little bit or looking a little bit different. And my friend Chris goes, No, no, he’s not sick, he’s blind, he always looks like that, you know? So so yeah, we’re constantly having having a blast, you know, and and just you know, using humor as empathy and connection.
Gavin:
That’s great. That’s great. So I am curious, w I you can interpret this question however you want, but what mountain sucks the most?
SPEAKER_01:
Um well uh my seventh summit, or my I should say my eighth summit, because there’s actually an eighth continent. It’s called Oceania, it’s out you know in the South Pacific, and there’s a bunch of islands.
David:
You all just heard of breaking news here. There’s eight continents.
Gavin:
Yeah, wait a minute.
SPEAKER_01:
New Zealand’s like New Zealand’s part of the um uh some people call it Australasia. Yeah. Yeah. And um, so if you climb the tallest peak in Australia, it’s kind of boring. It’s like a seven and a half thousand foot peak. Easy. We had a good time, we skied down that and and had a good time, but um but the in in Australasia or Oceania it’s called Karsten’s Pyramid, and you have to track you actually land um on a grass runway in the jungle, and then you trek for a week through the jungle.
SPEAKER_03:
Wow.
SPEAKER_01:
And it was so miserable. I mean, we would hike for twelve hours a day in the rain, and you’d be climbing up a vertical slope of mud and grass and roots, and then down the vertical side, the other side, and then crossing these bridges over hundreds of feet ravines with raging rivers below, and you’re crawling on a like a bridge that’s built out of rattan vines. You’re like, wow, I’ll snap at any time. And and I remember just slipping on the way into camp one night after that 12-hour, one of those 12-hour days, and just ripped my hand to shreds, and I was so done with the jungle. And I I actually remember crying, like tears coming out of my eyes, and my friend Charlie, who’s this like tough, gnarly climbing dude, and I’m like in on his shoulder crying.
Gavin:
Because it just sucked so much.
David:
It sucked so bad. Oh my god, this I thought I was gonna die in the jungle. You’re like, God, I just wish I was in a Hilton garden inn right now, eating a worm chocolate chip cookie, or if every or a huge dick from Oakagua.
SPEAKER_01:
Absolutely. But my friends also, my friend Chris Morris invented this thing called he calls them positive pessimisms. And it’s a way to deal with suffering, just kind of suffer well in the mountains because you do a ton of suffering.
Gavin:
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:
And so, like, for instance, you’re sitting around the stove and you’re just frozen, you’re miserable, and the snow’s hammering you in the face. And you know, Chris will look up and he’ll big smile and he’ll go, sure, it’s cold out here, but at least it’s windy. You know, sure I’ve been climbing a long way, but at least we’re lost. You know, this we don’t have enough gas for food, but at least there’s dirt in our food, you know? Yeah. So, yeah. And and so we have a blast with uh positive pessimisms.
Gavin:
Now, I have been an uh an outdoorsman a lot, actually. I grew up in Colorado and um I’ve climbed a fair amount of mountains, though obviously in comparison, not at all. But um Did you climb the eighth one? Because there’s eight. There’s eight, apparently. But um I was simply gonna say. I completely lost my train of thought. Why was I even why was I making it about me? I was making it about myself, right?
David:
Let’s just talk about Gaben for a few minutes to make him feel at easier.
Gavin:
There is so much suffering that goes on. And I feel like it’s worth pushing through and having grit. And that’s something I’m really preoccupied with my kids, is that especially in their very much um kid gloves, silk um environment that they’re protected from everything. I’m like, no, no, no. You need to suffer a little bit to get through like the sense of accomplishment. And so often I feel to me it’s it’s just about a sense of accomplishment. So that prompts me to ask to br to talk about myself, but then say, why do you do all of this crazy stuff?
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, what what’s the matter with you? Well, one, I I’ll comment on what you were talking about because with the grit with the kids, and like it often backfires. I feel like parenting, often your tricks and strategies backfire. You know, so I run an organization called No Barriers, and we help people with different kinds of challenges break through barriers in their life and figure out how they’re going to elevate the world. And so we organize these wonderful hikes, and one of them was in Colorado. We’re hiking up a mountain, my both my kids are there. Um, and and uh you know, there’s a guy who had had five strokes in his life, uh, who was hiking, and a guy who had lost a hundred pounds uh and was struggled with obesity, and a lady with a full heart transplant. Um and they’re hiking along, and my daughter Emma says, Dad, I have a headache, I feel sick, I want to turn back. And I’m like, Emma, look at these people, look at this woman, she’s got a full heart transplant, and she’s walking up the mountain. And Emma went, Thanks a lot, Dad. And I was like, Oh, wait, I’m a highly uh successful motivational speaker in the world, and with my kids, I’m a highly successful demotivational speaker.
Gavin:
So that’s amazing.
SPEAKER_01:
So yeah, who knows? I mean, but why I do it, I mean, you know, I don’t I can tell you why I don’t do it. I don’t do it to defy death or be an adrenaline junkie or prove that blind people can do this or that. I mean, maybe that’s like a a tiny bit of uh a kernel of truth there, but I really try to climb because it’s a celebration of the possibilities of what you can do in life and what you can achieve with your team that’s cohesive. And it’s so fun. Even though we talked about the suffering, you know, you’re sitting around like it’s like summer camp, you know, you’re just having a blast and teasing each other and drinking tea and making jokes and having great deep conversations. Uh it’s it’s like summer camp, but it’s really cold. So it’s the opposite of it’s winter camp, I guess you call it. And then when you suffer with your friends, you create this deep connection that I I don’t it’s I think it’s really hard to get in life. You know, I’ve had my life, my friend Jeff Evans, I have my life in his hands a hundred times, and and vice versa. And uh I just don’t think you can it’s it you can get that in the civilian world, but I think climbing and the military are like you know definitely two ways that people come out of it with these incredibly deep relationships that last a lifetime.
David:
So I’m gonna I’m gonna challenge you on that for a second, Eric, because I have some proof in your book, which is I’m holding up to the camera now. Let’s see, No Barriers, a blind man’s journey to kayak the Grand Canyon. And in the book, there’s yeah, we’re showing the book. In the book, there’s there’s a lot of great stories and stuff, but you also include a bunch of pictures. And one stuck out to me and and and made me slam the book shut. And it is a picture of a man drinking out of a prosthetic leg. And the caption says, After descending the mountain, we celebrate in the greatest way by passing around different sweaty, unwashed prosthetic legs and drinking a few toasts out of them. Oh, is this the fellowship you’re mentioning? Is this what you’re doing?
SPEAKER_01:
It totally is. That was our first No Barriers veterans uh trip. We did an experience where we climbed a 20,000-foot peak called Loboche, and uh we had 10 veterans, all of them were severely disabled from blind and deaf to, you know, and a lot of times it’s not just one injury, it’s like the guy who was blind was blind, he had PTSD, he had a traumatic brain injury, he was deaf in one ear, and his right hand worked horribly and got cold easily because he had been blown up in Iraq. And uh, and so yeah, and we had this wildly successful trip. Most of the team summited, and that launched our veterans programs, which we’ve done hundreds and hundreds of them through no barriers. But yeah, at the end of the trip, you celebrate. And uh one of the guys whipped off his sweaty prosthetic and uh we all drank whiskey out of it. Hopefully the whiskey killed the uh fungus.
David:
Okay, you know what? Whiskey’s actually okay. Uh for for whatever reason, that my thought was like a warm lager, and that just turned my stomach in awake. That’s even better. However, but a whiskey, you’re right, it’s gonna burn everything it touches.
SPEAKER_01:
Well, also on on the Grand Canyon, you do something. If if you fall out of your kayak, if you get knocked over by a wave, you what you’re ideally trying to do is roll up. So you kind of you’re upside down underwater, and you have to get your paddle to the surface and use it as a brace to roll yourself back upward, up so you’re upright. But when you don’t do that, sometimes you panic and you pull the skirt and you swim. And whenever you swim in a rapid, you have to drink what they call booty beer. So somebody takes their sweaty ass booty that’s like got you know, foot and river rot, and you have to drink a beer up. And so, yeah, there’s a lot of gross traditions in the outdoor world.
Gavin:
I would imagine in all of your travels, you have contracted a fair amount of sicknesses, and have they come from intentional things like booty beer, or did you just like get malaria because you were in the jungle for 12 days?
SPEAKER_01:
No, yeah, I’ve had malaria, I’ve had giardia, a horrible giardia. Um, one time in Kathmandu, I made the mistake of eating a yak steak that was maybe undercooked, and I I couldn’t lift my head off my pillow. And uh you know, sorry to be gross, but we’re here for it. It’s coming out of both ends simultaneously.
David:
Mouth and butt, simultaneously. Just at the same time. And then the gonorrhea didn’t help. I mean, it was just a gun that’s that didn’t help either. Yeah, or the hepatitis B.
Gavin:
Um, this is not the interview about your book that you would have gotten with Savannah Guthrie on the Today Show, and we are proud of it. Absolutely not.
David:
No, you’re on Gate Ch’Bay.
Gavin:
Because another thing about your book is do you realize how many thirst traps there are in your pictures? There’s a lot of skin, and we love it. Yeah, we’re here for it. We know what you’re doing. We know what you’re doing.
SPEAKER_01:
We know your audience. Um, after all. I don’t even remember that. You’re saying, like, um, you know, first of all, I was really, really fit on the Grand Canyon, so maybe.
Gavin:
Listen, you’re looking great. A lot of your friends are looking great. In particular, there’s a dude in overalls that are, I’m sure, not over, not like old Navy overalls.
SPEAKER_01:
Oh, yeah, that’s Lonnie Bedwell. That’s the blind guy I can’t kayak the canyon with.
Gavin:
He’s he’s looking good in his overalls. There’s also a picture of um when Hugh Herr leads the final pitch of ancient art about to confront the corkscrew that leads to the summit. Let me tell you, that corkscrew is a big ol’ mother nature dick in the sky.
David:
It is, it is a very phallic piece of nature for sure.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, it just juts right up like five, six hundred feet above the desert floor. It’s a wild, and there’s a loose boulder on top, too, and that you stand on it and it’s like wobbling, and you’re like, that’s great. Oh yeah.
Gavin:
The circumcision at the top.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah, it is kind of like that because it’s like a boldest boulder and it’s kind of a little bit more narrow underneath. We know what you’re doing with this book.
David:
Yeah, we know what you’re doing with this book. Also, can we talk about how thirsty I am? As I’m flipping through these pages, there is a there’s a they had built like a burning man style, like, you know, uh statue kind of, and they called it Burning Eric, and you have a picture of it. And the picture as I’m flipping through, I my first thought was, oh, who’s that guy? And then I look closer and I was like, that is a that is a straw statue of a person, you fucking thirsty asshoe. Um, so Eric, I want to bring it back to uh to parenting and blindness. And my my question I always ask people is what is the worst part of parenting and what’s the best part of parenting? But I’m curious if you want to put the addendum on like parenting as a blind person or just parenting in general.
SPEAKER_01:
I think the worst part is that you just worry about your kids all the time. It’s like if you want a simple life, don’t have kids, you know, because you just you you you own the as a parent, you know, I feel like you you have to be just the guide, right? You’re the guide in the mountains to them, you know, kind of showing them some ideas. But really ultimately it’s their life, it’s their journey, it’s their adventure to take on. And that’s the exciting part for young people. But at the same time, you just you worry and you own their uh their struggles as a parent. It’s just hard not to. So, you know, my son who’s adopted has had some struggles, you know, uh throughout his life. And my daughter has had some anxieties and things like that, and you just you want to be the solution, and you always you can’t always be the solution. And that’s I think that’s what makes it hard. Yeah.
unknown:
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:
All right.
David:
What’s the best part of parenting?
SPEAKER_01:
Oh, it oh, there’s no yeah, I don’t know.
David:
There is the answer. That’s the right answer. There is nothing, there’s no positive upside. Don’t anybody do it.
SPEAKER_01:
Yeah. Uh no. I the the the great part is that the connection and the and the love that you have, you know, like you know, earlier you’d said, oh, what’s it like with your kids being having a dad who’s climbed mountains or famous or whatever? My kids could care less about that. Yep. When they were young, you know, they wanted to wrestle and play polypockets, and that’s what dads should do. Time is so short. You know, my kids are 21 and 23 now, and uh, you know, I wish I could go back in time and and live it all over again, even the even the long days trying to figure out how to entertain them. I I would recommend for people, and again, this probably nobody will take my advice, but don’t have kids until you’re a little bit older, you know, until you’re a little bit more mature, and you and and it’s life isn’t all about you. You know, when I was in my 20s, I was trying to make a name for myself as a climber. I was away for months and months on end. I mean, when I came home, I would try to have really quality time with my family, but um, you know, you you’re just off trying to conquer the world, and it’s really hard to do that and be a good parent at the same time. My dad was the greatest dad in the world. He um he worked a really, really hard job on Wall Street. He’d leave at six in the morning and get home at like eight at night, but he never missed a wrestling match. Never, not one. And, you know, and we’d go to dinner every night and on the weekends we’d wrestle in the uh in my wrestling mat in my garage and lift weights together and play baseball games or listen to baseball games on the radio. And I I have the greatest memories of what parenting should be. Um, but it’s hard.
David:
Gavin, did you hear what he said about life isn’t all about you? Did you hear that part? I did you write a note?
Gavin:
I did make note of that to myself when he did say that.
SPEAKER_01:
And I’ll tell you one more thing because my dad was um he was the first my organization is called No Barriers, and I feel like in a way I named it after my dad. My mom, sorry to be depressing, but my mom died in a car accident when I was right after I went blind. So that was a really hard time. And my dad just stepped up and became Mr. Mom. And um, I used to ride my mountain bike down my driveway, and uh I built these ramps, wooden ramps at the bottom, and I’d fly over one and I’d land on a big plyboard ramp that I built, and I just thought that was so cool. And one day I couldn’t see those ramps anymore because they blended in with the pavement. And so my dad could have said, Hey, no more mountain biking, but instead he went down and he’s like, I got an idea, and he painted the ramps a very bright orange so they contrasted the pavement. And even though I was almost blind at that point, I could see the ramps and I could jump over them. Yeah, and uh my dad and my two brothers actually laid down between the ramps and I jumped over them like evil can evil. Oh my god. That’s how much my family believed in me. So I am so lucky to have had that kind of parent.
SPEAKER_03:
Yeah.
David:
I mean, we’re lucky to have found you in a weird way. Like this, the the stupid way that I we thought of you as a guest, and then the way Gavin and I just dove into your book, dove into your story, got so excited, we were like, this fucking guy is amazing. We can’t wait to have him on the show. Yeah, I don’t and and the the stupid way you got here, you know what? I’m so thankful that that happened, right? Because, like that, like you said, that propelled your life. But this this book is incredible. It’s called No Barriers A Blind Man’s Journey to Kayak the Grand Canyon. I can’t believe you would demean yourself by being on our stupid little podcast, but thank you.
SPEAKER_01:
Well, I’ll tell you, 70% of that book is true. Nice. Oh yes.
Gavin:
Well, so can we ask what will be next for you? What is uh what’s the next um summit or canyon or river or ocean or to conquer or continent to discover, as it were? Or prosthetic leg to drink out of.
SPEAKER_01:
Well, I can tell you I’m 55, right? And so, you know, time you know, I’m not gonna be climbing at the top world-class level forever, you know. And so um I I kind of am careful because I don’t want to feel like, you know, like, oh, I climbed ever site, and now have to do something harder and harder and riskier and scarier. Because that sort of is a dead end road and actually leads a lot of times to to death. And uh I want to live a long life. My buddy uh told me uh the other day, he said, Hey, we’ve made it this far, we might as well make it to the end. And so um, so I I wanna I want to live a good long life, and um, but I’m still adventuring. Um I’m gonna be ice climbing in Valdez, Alaska in February and ice climbing all over the country this winter, and uh um and uh uh in June I’m gonna head to the bugaboos, which is in Canada, to climb this huge thousand meter vertical rock face. In July I’ll be in Pakistan climbing a six thousand meter peak, and then late September I’m considering a mountain biking trip. It’s a 30-day tri uh mountain biking trip over the Andes. So I’m still getting after it. And then no barriers, uh, my organization, we really want to grow it because there’s so much divide, there’s so much anger and hostility in the world. But when people come together with different kinds of challenges, um and they lift each other up as a community and they say we’re gonna solve our problems together and we’re gonna help each other break through these barriers and and live more fulfilling lives, it’s I think it’s the it’s the recipe of what the world needs right now. So we want to grow this idea um as far as we can take it. And I took these kids, by the way, a little side note, and uh not to get too heavy, but like we trekked across um uh this deepest canyon in the world all the way into Tibet with these kids. Uh it was a no barriers youth trip, and I led it, and uh uh we had kids with every kind of challenge under the sun, you know. We had kids with depression and kids uh who were disabled, a deaf kid, a blind kid, uh uh a kid who had been kicked out of school a bunch of times because of violence, and uh he got his head wrapped around it and took some did some, you know, got some therapy, and he was there trying to figure out his future. And one kid was uh had this rare disease that kind of um m made his bones fuse together, and he was in braces, um leg braces, and uh every night we would have the kids um hold this what we call the alchemy stick and tell their stories, and that kid told his story, and he’s like, Hey, my real barrier is not that I am disabled physically. He’s like, My real barrier was coming out of the closet, and he’s like, you know, and I went to a Catholic school and on the bus, people would beat the shit out of me, throw me off the bus, and call me a crippled faggot. Oh, wow and we’re all crying. Yeah, we’re all crying, and it was like, and so these barriers that people face in life, they’re so deep and so profound, but yet in a weird way, they can become your strength.
David:
They so often do, right? They so often become your your difference, is what makes you the that’s your super partner. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01:
And I hope I wasn’t offensive there, but I mean I that’s the story, and and it’s real.
David:
No, we appreciate it. No, the only offensive part about you is that that prosthetic leg thing. I’m never gonna get over that, if I’m being honest. Uh uh, Gavin, you heard Eric’s uh schedule for next year. What’s what’s on your schedule for Fed?
Gavin:
No, I was I was that’s funny, David. I was gonna ask you exactly the same thing. David, are you gonna join him on any of these ice climbing adventures or in the dare I say the bugaboos in Canada, which is I have so many questions about that.
David:
No, I’m gonna start hiking to find those sausages. I’ve I’ve been thinking about those sausages since he talked about them. I’m gonna hike to find the gay sausages and the and the dick club.
Gavin:
Eric, thank you for demeaning yourself by coming on our stupid podcast. We are so honored. I’m so thankful. Thank you. I uh and I am gonna challenge David to do a no barriers trip at some point because uh we would all be better off doing more.
SPEAKER_01:
Let’s just come out to one of our uh events. We have these wonderful events mostly held here in the Rockies where we hike mountains and do wonderful clinics and have speakers and entertainers, and it’s really, really fun. I would love that. I invite you anytime. All right, I would love it. All right, thank you, Eric. Thanks, guys.
David:
So, my something great uh holiday themed um was an advent calendar. So I I think I’ve had advent calendars as a kid in my life with like chocolates behind each little door. Sure. Um, but I was at Aldi and I saw this Paw Patrol uh advent calendar. And you know, listen, I was I was a sucker. I was like, you know, this could be cute. There are young ones. It is so adorable because every day my son pops out of bed and goes, Can we open door seven? He knows what day of the month it is because he knows what door he gets to open. And behind it, it all at the end will come together as this big Paw Patrol playset of them camping or something. Yeah, but every day is like a tree or a log or one of the characters or a house or whatever. And it just fills him with such fucking joy that I I absolutely love it. So, my something great this week is the Paw Patrol advent calendar.
Gavin:
That definitely gave you a good holiday. And on my end, um so my kids are getting out of uh toys, which is kind of sad. Which makes Christmas morning different, you know? Like you open up some pants and you’re super excited about it, and then they’re like, now can I get on my phone? And you’re like, No, you have to sit around and okay, you’re right. I just want to go get on my phone too. But this year I broke down and I said, you know what? I’m just gonna force some Legos back into the situation. My kids were never actually huge Legos fans, but I thought, let’s just get a complicated Lego thing to put together on our own. So I got a Star Wars y thing, and luckily I was able to bribe them into sitting around a table as Dirty sipta bloody merry. And I got at least 27 minutes of Lego building time, even though they’re like, eh, this is kind of for little kids, but it’s still fun. So I that was something great was Legos can still be timeless.
David:
I noticed that your uh one of your parenting resolutions was not drink less wine at the kitchen table with your children. Absolutely not.
Gavin:
And that’s our show. If you have any comments, suggestions, or general compliments, you can email us at gatriarchspodcast at gmail.com.
David:
Or you can DM us on Instagram. We are at Gatriarchspodcast. On the internet, David is at DavidFMBonEverywhere, and Gavin is at GavinLodge on Yellowtail.
Gavin:
Please leave us a glowing five star review wherever you get your podcasts.
David:
Thanks, and we’ll see you next time on another episode of Gatriarchs!